cake

How to: make the perfect Victoria Sponge.
Everyone loves cake, delicious, soft, sweet, heart ache consoling cake.     

First thing first, ingredients. I use my mums fail-safe 4,4,4,2 theory just because it's easy to remember in every situation.

• 4oz SR flour
• 4oz Margarine
• 4oz Castor Sugar
• 2 eggs
• vanilla essence 

Second thing second, Equipment.

• Pre-heated oven (180 degrees c, gas mark 4)
• Mixing bowl
• Kitchen weighing scales
• Counter top mixer/hand whisk/strong arm and wooden spoon
• 2 cake tins/1 cup cake tray
• grease proof paper

Thirdly, the sweetness that heals.

option 1

• whipped double cream
• icing sugar
• jam (traditionally it's strawberry, but i prefer raspberry for its extra tang. Alternatively, use what you like)

option 2

• margarine
• icing sugar
• jam (thought of anything you might like to use? apricot could be good)

Last but most certainly not least, lets get our cake on!

• Pre-heat your oven to 180C/gas mark 4
• Put butter into mixing bowl and beat until pale yellow and soft.
• Weigh and sieve the 4oz flour into your mixing bowl with the creamed butter, sugar and eggs.
• Now you want to mix it all together gently so the flour doesn't fly everywhere, mix until you behold a smooth batter. This is a good time to add the vanilla essence, keep tasting to get it just right.
• Once the mixture resembles something like wet (not sticky) batter, beat it faster and harder, the idea here is to get air into the mix, creating tiny bubbles that will expand in the mix when it heats up, thus making your sponge light and fluffy and heavenly. Stop every now and again, to check for miniscule bubbles in the mix, if you see them, stop mixing, you don't want to beat them out again! If you feel your mix is too sticky or thick add a dash of milk and gently fold in.
• Leave mix to stand.
• Grease the insides of your tins with butter (wipe some margarine around with kitchen towel/pastry brush) and cut a circle the same size as the bottom of the tin out of baking paper, to stop the sponge sticking.
• Pour mix into the tins and put them into your now hot oven.
• If making cupcakes, put cupcake cases in cupcake tray, and fill them 2/3 full.(you will now notice you have a mixing bowl and spoon/whisk with cake mixture remnants on them. Go and find a deserving child, or be selfish and wipe clean with fingers and consume).

• Leave the cakes for 20-25 minutes or until they are golden brown on top. 
• When you take your cakes out, you should be to press them gently and have them spring back. Side Note. DO NOT open the oven door until after 20-25 minute marker, the air bubbles will pop and your cakes will sink!

Whilst your cakes are in the oven, prepare the butter icing! (Instructions on next page)

The Rules!

• Cakes are temperamental little things, so here are the rules:
• Talk nicely to them and always be polite.
• Don’t open the oven door whilst they’re getting ready; they don’t like to be watched, would you? (In actual fact it
• makes the air rush out, the carefully whisked in bubbled pop and your cake sinks)
• Wait for them to cool before cutting them from the tin! Be patient, for patience is a virtue and gives better cake.

Kitchen Essentials

Most wanted kitchenalia
A well fed list of can't-live-without kitchen items

• Non stick frying pan - for non stick fry-ups
• Pans, Set of at least 3 if not 5 - for when you finally pluck up the courage for that Sunday roast with all the trimmings.
• A wok - there ain't nothin' you can't cook in a wok!
• Salt and pepper grinders/shakers - seasoning makes a world of difference.
• Wooden spoons - you never know when you might need it and metal ones get HOT.
• Garlic crusher - eat garlic! its good for you.
• Lemon juicer - PANCAKE DAY!
• Hand whisk/food processor - always good, for when you can't be bothered to mix/cut by hand.
• Set of knives - duh.
• Veg peeler - also good for slicing cheese.
• Potato masher -also good for mashing bananas for banana cake, just sayin'.
• Big bowls, little bowls (cardboard box) - for cereal, spaghetti, noodles, soup, popcorn, salad.
• Big plates, little plates - jam on toast, cheese on toast, for helping jelly wibble and wobble.
• Wine glasses, standard glasses, mugs - standard.
• Pint sized mugs! (trust me, you'll thank me the morning after)
• Sugar pot, tea pot, coffee pot (usually sold as a three, but do go charity shopping and see what random pots you can get a hold of!)
• Mixing bowl - good for mixing. and also serving salad/popcorn/large quantities of ice cream.
• Cake tins - one day, you will have to make a cake without eating all of the raw mix first.
• Zester - lemon drizzle cake. Need i say more?
• Cheese slicer - self explanatory.
• Pestle and mortar - crush it crush it crush it real good.
• Growing herbs - good for helping 'left overs' day feel less like 'left overs' day.
• Griddle pan - steak.
• Marble chopping board - for good old fashioned pastry making, pastry needs cold. Also good for putting cheese on.
• Knife sharpener - always better to cut (food) with a sharp knife that a blunt one.
• Pallet knife - if you never use it to flip pancakes, can make for excellent wall paper peelers.
• Pastry brush - for egging/milking your pastry.
• Rolling pin - or cold empty wine bottle.
• Thick wooden chopping board - takes a beating better than the thin plastic ones.
• Measuring jugs - if all else fails and you don't use it for cooking, good for helping along party mixers.
• Slotted spoon - nobody likes soggy pasta.
• Oven gloves - saves you burning your fingers or dish towels.
• Hot sexy boyfriend that cooks so you don't have to - not compulsory but worth looking out for.
• Tin opener - your best friend when you're tired and want instant gratification and you realise the tin has no ring pull.
  
• Table spoon - much faster serving with a big spoon.
• Microplanes - for grating cheese, chocolate, carrot, fingers.
• Bottle openers - you always presume you have one, yet when it comes to opening the ice cold beer after work you realise you do not.
• Casserole dish - multipurpose.
• Spatula - for getting every last drop, for instant consumption or just for a correct recipe.
• Scissors - opening packets, cutting paper, cutting ribbons, stray threads, broken nails.
• Flat and deep baking trays - multipurpose.
• Egg slicer - really only useful if you like sliced egg in your salads.